A Little Idiocy Never Hurt Or Did It?
by Unkown Being
Summary: Ok so I died right? Yep! But apparently that's not the end for my soul or something like that so I'm reborn as Sephiroth twin brother? Right, so I might as well as fuck up this story with being a true idiot since geniuses usually fuck everything up before it goes to shit while I can since I'm here right? I mean it not lik-Aww fuck me! I just realized I'm related to Hojo!
1. Welp I'm Dead!

**Unkown: (Peeps Out Of Corner Of A Brick Wall) Hi! Everyone I Am Sorry I Haven Be On For A…Really Really REALLY Long Time But I Got Really Busy Because Of A Lot Of Thing So Again I Am Sorry! Also Iv Decided TO Put Up A Poll To Decide If I Should Rewrite My Other FanFiction So Please Vote! Anyway I Decided To Writ This Because I Got Really Addicted To Reading Final Fantasy VII Fiction (I Had Not Played The Game Though Too…Blocky) So I Hope You Like This Fan Fiction! (Hides Behind Wall Again)**

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 **Prologue** **: Welp I'm Dead!**

You ever had one of those really good days that are just great then something incredibly stupid happens that ruined your entire day like if you got check from work and then when you go to cash it at the bank you end up in the middle of a bank robbery? Well that happen to me!

What Happen You May Ask? Well I died!

No seriously I died.

It was a really dumb death too.

I mean like a 'what the fuck?' sort of death.

You see it was snowing out so me and my little cosines that I and my two brother was force to watch while their parents went out to a party with my dad or something I don't know all I heard was blab blab I don't give a fuck blab, so we were all just chilling (Well me chilling while my older brother was chasing our little cosines and my younger brother around the house) till we (my older brother) decided (Force us) to have snowball fight to get rid of all the sugar I had intentionally given to my cousins to get back at their parent when they came to pick them up and be force to deal with two hyper active eight and seven year old boys but my older brother didn't want that nooo my older brother said "we have to give then back when there tiered not hyper it would be wrong to force them to deal with that after they themselves are tired." or something of the sort I was paying attention to the TV more then him.

But either way he's a Kissass.

Anyway so we (and by we I mean my older brother) decided to take them outside to have a snow ball fight and while I was trying to run away from my little cosines Painful Snowballs Of Death but not very good since I'm really not athletic…Ok ok I'm a fatty, happy? And my brothers laughing in the background (Sadistic shitheads basterds) I was looking back at my cosines while cursing at them and my brothers (My oldest brother was telling me not to curse in front of children I just gave repeated what I called him before at him) and run out into the street between the small space of the two cars in our fount yard.

And of course a car was driving in the street.

You know now that I think about it I always thought I would die from my cat suffocating me in my sleep from sleeping on my face.

Anyway since I literally just came out of nowhere like one of the squirrels and raccoons that live on our block I got run over by the said car. But no this was not a ordinary car.

I got run over by a truck.

You know the ones that are only suppose be on highways because of how large they are?

I don't know how exactly the way I became road kill but from what I think happen from the way my body felt was that I got blasted from the left side of my body enough to break bones and roughly push from the force onto the street ground and felt the tires from the right of the car I think was breaking my spine and crushing my inner organs around that area.

I wonder if they got liquefied from the force or if they even can.

My death wasn't even instant or ales I don't think it was. I didn't even feel the cold heard frosty street road and but I think I heard a scream (Sissy's) but who's I don't really know. (Probably from my oldest brother though.)

But you know what I did know?

That the asshole that ran me over kept on driving.

And driving.

And driving.

And driving.

AND DID'T EVEN STOP TO SEE IF I WAS ALRIGHT!

So With the last of my dying strength, will, determination, hope, anger, and vary essence of my being I did the one thing that was my final farewell to the world.

You know what I did.

Do you?

Can you guess?

No?

Well what I did with the last of my strength is very simple.

.

.

.

.

.

.

.

.

.

.

I gave that Asshole driver the bird.

 _'What a prick.'_ Was my final thought of that life as Nicklee (Fucking) West twenty three year old most badass girl you shall ever meet.

Or not meet, however this fucking works.

You may now morn for my lose world, galaxy, and whatever else will miss/worship the awesome and cool me.

.

.

.

.

.

.

Mourning done yet? No? Too bad! Because I got something else to say before we continue on words.

You know that even though you have ended one life it doesn't mean it's the end of the soul.

Sometimes it just the start of something new and fucked up.

And believe me it is fucked up.

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 **Unkown: And That's It! So You All Know The Drill Review, Follow, Support, And Pray For Updates, Bye!**


	2. Kitty Cat Eyes Meet!

**Unkown: I'm Back Again I hope You Will Like This Chapter Making Forth The True Beginning Of The Story. And also most of this are in Nicklee head as she currently has no real reason to talk yet And there a bit of a dark moment in this just to let you know.**

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 **Chapter 1: I Need Pants, Creepasaurus Comes with realization, And Kitty Cat Eyes Meet!**

 _'...This Sucks...'_ Was my only thought as I sat on the floor in the middle of the small pure white (How the hells is hat possible?) room with nothing in it but a metal bed with a matter that had a pillow and a thin but large blanket pushed to the corner of it, some ceiling light to light the room with a small Ceiling Ventilation vent, and a metal door with no window jests on the side of the room that allows them to see to entire room that is currently my room I believe.

Ah right we should do a recap right?

Well let's see…

...I was running away from my cousins, got run over by a truck, flip off the driver, died, and woke up in a white room!

Oh! And I don't have pants on just a white hospital gown and currently barefooted.

 _'This sucks.'_ Again I thought as I glared at the hidden camera in the corner of my room.

Who the hell keeps a camera in a kid's room!

Oh dear god I'm being watch by pedo's aren't I…

Ah I forgot to mention I'm currently in the body of a toddler I think or just a really small kid atlas three and half years.

I think, maybe, how the fuck should I know?!

The kids body I'm currently in is seriously pale like unhealthy kind of pale, vary petite shape boy strangely enough covered in a holy shit load of bandages, and with SILVER fucking hair that goes to my shoulder area and spiky bangs that look like their going zigzag dowers on both sides of my face, I think.

I haven't seen exactly what I look like yet but I'm pretty sure that I got all the things that make me human on the outside atlas.

Yes a perfectly normal human.

A normal human male.

 _'I miss my boobs.'_ I thought as I put both my hand on the area where my once b sized (THEY WERE NOT SMALL!) breast laid now was flat as a billboard and silently cried inside. After all I'm a adult so you never cry on the outside only when you stub you toe, cuz that shit fucking hurts.

I stop when I heard the unlocking of the door and opening of it.

"Specimen E, the professor wants to see you now." Came from a male voice as I look at him to see a middle age man in a white lab coat with black short hair with a typical nerd outfit on and looking vary nerviest.

I just look at him with me indifferent till I decided 'Fuck it' and got up to fallow him.

He just look a bit more nerviest as he move aside to let me past first before closing the door following me straight down the metal halls.

 _'This place REALLY needs color'_ I thought as I walk through the halls fallowing the man.

The man…you know what fuck it if I have to keep calling him the man then it wont ever end so for now and forever I dub thee Doctor Sissy.

Anyway Doctor Sissy stop us at another metal door (How many dose this place have?) and open it to revile a really weird lab or a perfectly normal doctor office.

'This place can give Doctor Frankenstein a run for his money or Bill the science guy.' I though as I walk in looking at the green filled tube like tanks in the room connected to pipes.

 _'Who ever filled up those tanks with that really green barf must have done a lot of puking and eating a lot of leafy greens, I can't decide what is worse...or maybe its green piss?'_ Was my only thought of the green stuff in the tanks.

"I presume the specimen has arrives." Said a voice from the left of the room as Doctor Sissy and I suddenly froze and turned to the left to where we could see a man (Not another man!) currently having his back to us as he was sitting in front of a desk filled with different thing I could not tell what they were but the only one I could make out was a brain in a jar.

...That's kind of cool.

"O-of course P-professor." Doctor Sissy said as he started to tense up and eyes wide with pure fear.

"Good now leave us before I decide to see how well you far in my next experiment." Said the man as the desk as he began to stand up.

"Y-y-yes P-p-professor!" Doctor Sissy said as he quickly made his escape and I thought _'No don't leave me Doctor Sissy!'_ as the man at the desk now standing turned to me.

"I Believe it is time for you check up" said the man fully turned to me.

But I could not find the voice to say anything.

Because I knew who the man in front of me was.

 _'Wha-what the fuck...'_

As much as I denied it.

 _'But…h-he couldn't be…'_

But he was.

He was Professor Hojo.

He's a video game character.

And he's right in front of me.

In the flesh.

I'm in final fantasy seven…

 _'This sucks.'_ My last thought about this situation as I, as much as I resisted fainted.

 **I'm A Line I'm A Line I'm A Line I'm A Line I'm A Line I'm A Line Oh Oh Oh OHHH I'm A Line Yyyaaahhhh**

That was two days ago that it happened.

Aplenty when I died I had somehow got into final fantasy seven…

No not just any type of fall into a body of a character sort of thing but had to be fall into the body of apparently Sephiroth brother from what I heard from the gossip the other scientist said around when they think I'm not listening.

Why couldn't I have fallen into a cloud younger or older sister or better yet Vincent's! Hack I wouldn't even mind if it was a boy's body I fell into just as long as I was related to anyone of the characters that were made solely on fucking Jenova cells (I don't care if Sephiroth is or isn't made solely on Jenova cells I'm too stress for bullshit right now and he still has a shit load of them!) and didn't go batshit insane and decide to think it a great idea to kill everything in their way because there 'mommy' tells them too!

 _'Fuck my two lives…'_ I thought as I tried my best not to cry from the stress of being Sephiroth brother, having Jenova cells in me, being reborn in Final Fantasy Seven, and most important of all not having pant as I laid in my bed.

"I can't believe we have to watch this brat!" Said Sir Douchebag from the left of the door as he gripped his gun tighter while wearing a third class SOLDIER's uniform and helmet that covered a large amount of his face.

"Calm down Jack, he's not that bad" Said Wall Man from the right of the door leaning on the wall with his gun lazily in his grip also with a third class SOLDIER's uniform and same helmet on.

I should probably explain the SOLDIER guard right? Well you see after I awoke from being suddenly surprise sleep (Not fainting!) from two day earlier I was back I had tried to escape from the place, so I had gone through the vent when no one was looking after I had destroyed to hidden camera in my room with my pillow, push bed to its side then pull it up words do that the large straight part of it pointed directly under the ceiling vent then climbed up the bed into the vent and crawled through the vents to try to get out of the building.

I personally thought it was impressive.

Hojo not so much.

But who gives a fuck to what he thinks.

Anyway I didn't technically get caught but rather I fell down on one of the ventilation in the vents.

Right in front of Sephiroth.

 ***FLASHBACK TIME***

 _'Fuck!_ ' I thought as green kitty-cat eyes (So cute) stared in green kitty-cat eyes. (I kind of hope because I love cats ok.)

Sephiroth just stared but I don't think he was really looking at me for some reason.

'What the-Ah' as I came to realize as I stared at Sephiroth from his bed that he was currently trying to sitting up straight but was still slouching side to side and staring at me with unfocused eyes.

He must of just got done with mako shots or was just getting over a sedated drug.

I then truly got a good look at Sephiroth then and there.

He was warring the same type of white hospital gown as me with bandages that had some blood on the one wrapped around the left of his arm, has almost the same type of hair cut as me but straighter hair with no hair out of place, and is currently higher then fuck right now.

I decided to test that 'higher then fuck' theory by getting up walking to him a lightly push him backwards with the painter finger on my left hand.

He didn't even stand a chance.

"Pff-hahahaha!"I couldn't help but laugh as I watch Sephiroth the future hero of Wutai, the man who eats fucking dragon for breakfast, one of the most powerful game characters to be created in video game history falls backwards on to the bed with his legs hanging from the side of the bed from a simple push of a finger (And no I don't have Tsunade strength from Naruto).

Sephiroth…the demon of Wutai to the Watai people who helped kill so many of their people both soldiers and civilians alike that they could only be a town instead of a country in the future, that has Shinra and Hojo ruin his life and any chance of lading a normal life by turning him into a monster for their own gain, gets pretty much betrayed by those he called his friend that I believe he would have gladly came with them if they ask, who's never truly known his true mother Lucrecia and thinks Jenova is his mother that only want to use him to kill the planet, who will burn a entire town because of the insanity he will gain from Jenova whispers and Hojo sick lies, who could not even find rest after death because he wish to fulfill Jenova wishes that then becomes his wish in his broken mind, and will forever be known as Sephiroth the Nightmare.

My laughter slowly came to an end with those shitty realizations.

…But here he is helpless and vary weak.

Just a child stuck in a horrible situation and not knowing what his future will be.

I…I could end him here save both the planet and himself misery and grief and allowing myself to live a normal life after I escape and get as far away from Shinra, Hojo, Jenova, and whatever fucking huge ass mess as possible.

I slowly felt myself moving till I was kneeling on the bed with Sephiroth then sat on top of his stomach trapping him and not allowing him to be able to move with my hands reaching for his throat…

…Till Sephiroth moved his head to the left of my hand to be petted.

I froze immediately, not expecting something like THAT from Sephiroth.

I began to move my hand away from his head till he made a protesting noise and eyes looking at me pleadingly.

 _'So so…'_ Was all could thing as I shifted from sitting to laying right next to Sephiroth…

…And began to pet his head again while he began to fucking PURR!

 _'SO FUCKING CUTE!'_

The Curtness that been brought forth by kitten Sephiroth became too much as I couldn't help myself but pull Sephiroth into a hug and cuddle him.

 _'Fuck! He aimed straight for my weak spot in my heart!'_ I thought next after I kept hugging Sephiroth for a while and began to think.

 _'Sephiroth was pretty much alone for his life with only Hojo as his company and Gast at the beginning till he ran away because of his grief leaving Sephiroth ALONE with Hojo! Hojo of all people! That man if he existed in my world would have a picture of him at chuck cheese with a sign saying 'Run Away!', maybe…maybe I can change Sephi-no Sephiroth is not something I should call him it would remind me of the Sephiroth he could be if I fail so perhaps Sep…yes Sep Perhaps I can change Sep's Fate. '_ I began to pet Sephiroth head once more while hugging him.

"…Well Sep you're not going to be alone this time, I promise to you I will change you fate and those that you love as well!"

I then perch my lips. "I just need to know how."

 ***FLASHBACK END***

After that I was found by the other scientist and forcibly but not without a few scratches to their face and a lot of their screams of pain (Pussies) ripped out of my hugging of Sep and thrown back into my room with guard now standing there.

…And suddenly realize what I just got myself into.

 _'I'm so screwed.'_ Thought as I summed up the fact of what I'm about to get myself into.

 _'Hey…I still don't know what my new name is!'_ I suddenly bolted into a sitting position scaring the two guards.

"Oh Goddess, that almost gave me a heart attack!" Said Wall man as he had his hand on his chest area where his heart would be.

"For fucking sakes brat would you give us a warning before deciding to be a little shit that you are!" Sir Douchebag shouted at me.

Now usually something like this doesn't get me angry but A. I'm stress out B. I have to figure out to change the plotting of a story I only read on wiki page and small videos on YouTube C. this asshole is pissing me off and D. I want to know my new name.

"Screw you, Sir Douchebag!" I yelled at the guard in anger.

Both guards froze at my outburst.

Then Wall man began to laugh as Sir Douchebag just stared.

"HAHAHA Oh Goddess that's hahaha the haha funniest hahaha thing I-I pff-hahaha ever heard s-someone c-call you HAHAH!" Wall Man Tried to say as he used the wall to support him.

 _'It's not even that funny.'_ Was all I could think of Wall mans outburst.

"Shut up Charlie before I punch you in the stomach!" Sir Douchebag shouted at Wall Man with a red face from what I could see the part of it was.

"Pff-hahaha" I couldn't help but join in the laughing of Wall Man at how red the part I could see of Sir Douchebag face.

"Both of you shut up!" Sir Douchebag Shouted getting red and red as our laughter increased.

"You know what fuck both of you!" Sir Douchebag finally snaps and opens the door to slam it with a large banging sound as he exited.

"hehehe" Both our laughter finally fades in to small giggles.

"You know this is the most I've ever seen you active." Wall man addressed me after the giggles finally faded.

"Really?" I was curious to what whoever had this body acted like before.

"Yeah, you use to just sit and be quiet but sometimes would call one of the scientist pedobears or call Hojo a Creepasaurus or something like that."

I faintly remember doing something like that now that he mentioned it…is it possible that this isn't a 'fall into body' type of way but rather a…rebirth since I died? And the reason I didn't remember this was that when I was born was because I had a baby's brain instead of a kid or adults?

 _'Fuckidy why me head hurt so muchy?'_ I thought unintelligible since I was just about done with thinking.

But there was one last question I needed answered before going to brain rebooting process (Sleep).

"Hey Wall man can you tell me my name?" I just decided fuck it give me answers.

"W-Wall man? Err… Well your names Entropy" Wall man said in surprise.

"Entropy…" So basically I'm called disorder.

Make sense since I sure Hojo didn't plan for me to exist and I'm about to fuck shit up.

Still fucking weird though but meh I suppose it doesn't matter.

"Well Night-Night stalker Wall man!" I shouted at Wall man and lay in bed with the blanket over me and head on the pillow.

"Hey wait I have questions about this Wall man thing-don't just ignor-" was all I heard as I quickly fell asleep with my final thoughts.

 _'I Promise Sep I will find you and the others a happy ending…after all I am an Entropy to this story.'_

It was then quickly fallowed by _'That sounds fucking cheese.'_

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 **Unkown: Ok And It For Now So Please Review, Tell Me What You Think Love It, Hate It, Please Go Easy On Me Though I Not Really A Writer Person But I Try My Best. Bye! W**


	3. Wall Guard Is Spiderman!

**Unkown: Hey Everyone! I Have Updated Again! I Promise Even Though The Story Seems Confusing Now It Will Make More Sense Sooner Or Later! Also You See I Work So A lot Of This Is Written After Work Where Your Brain Pretty Much Dead At That Point And I Get Weird Work Hours Too So Yeah.**

 **Serious Unkown: Also I Have To Be Honest Some Of This Won't Follow The Same Timeline As The Original Game Bet They Will Still Be There Just They Might Be In Different Forms Of How They Happen Or Just Not Happen For One Reason Or Another Sorry.**

 **Unkown: On With This Story!**

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 **Chapter 2: Scaring Memories, Draigourish Thingy, and Wall Guard Is Spiderman!**

After the craziness that the last few days brought I was now finally ready to deal with the fact that I now live in final fantasy seven, living in the same building with Hojo, being Sep (Sephiroth) sibling even though he hasn't done anything (yet), had a space disease inside of me that could force me to destroy the entire planet for some evil alien squidish like lady man thingy (whatever you want to call it, it's still creepy and the definition of a nope's in the universes), and most important of all a male now.

 _'Sob'_

Ok maybe not.

 _'I'm so screwed!'_ I thought as I began to mentally cry again while trying to play I spy with Wall guard (I need a new nickname for him.) in a pure white room with no colors and has only a few thing in it with the air vent put back into place, the bed nailed to the floor, and the new security camera broken (like I'm going to let those perv's keep watching me without pants on).

So far we were tied for some reason.

"I spy with my little eyes something…bright." Wall guard said laying on the floor with his arms crossed over his head well helmet to use as a pillow as I was just laying on the floor with my arms resting on my stomach as both he and I stared at the ceiling.

"Is it the light bulb?"

"Yep! Your tune."

"Hmmm…" I wasn't really paying attention to the game but more focus on what I'm going to do about changing the story plot but I also manage to come up with a theory of why I had not remember the first three years of life that I found out from the other scientist after some torture of singing 'This is the song that never ends' till they all begged me to stop in tears. (Pussy's.)

My own birth that's what. (Dame I just felt a chill through me.)

Now you might thing it no big deal but imagine being squished from all sides of your body with complete darkness and barely able to breathe other then a small tube in your stomach and of course as I learned in hell class (Health class) that babies during the second trimester then onwards pee in the womb then fucking drink it then pee again (Just what the fuck babies?) then all of a sudden when you find the light you were looking for you end up looking right into the giant face that is Hojo's face.

Like Attack on Titan but much MUCH worse.

Because of that event I was very much traumatized (Along with the fact that I became road kill but who really cares about that.) and had apparently suppress pretty much everything about myself because of it.

So after much concentration, popping a few of my blood vessels (Man Hojo was PISSED OFF about that.), and yelling 'why' over and over again after remembering some (A lot.) of repress thing in my old life Nicklee, like when walking in to my parent room when they were playing 'Naughty nurse and doctor'.

I shall forever regret remembering that but atlas I know why I yell 'mommy stop sticking that in daddy hinny!' when I'm around doctors and nurses.

Moving on from the emotional scares I have remembered and try to forget again (so far not luck), I found out me and Sep weren't just any twins no we were conjoined twin!

Explains the scar on my back but I'm kind of sad that it wasn't from some evil noseless freak named 'Moldyshorts' that tried to kill me because I got super powers.

Guess you can't get everything you wish for.

But anyway I think I found out why the Sep in the cannon or atlas I think he didn't have a sibling was because of squidish like lady man thingy cells. You see I think it was because the cells that he and I both have that the cell joined together and stop Sep from having a sibling (me) because we had joined as one being but luckily for us it only conjoined us from our back and then had to get surgery to be separated. (Which sucked monkey balls.)

Which I'm very happy about since it would be very weird to have to go to the bathroom with someone on your back the entire time and deal with the smell when they had to use it too.

So from what I also found while trying to reviewing the suppress memories is that me and Sep's had not met each other before the air vent fiasco. So that kind of suck and I'm starting to make plans to sneak off to see Sep when I can.

You might be wondering why is it that now I suddenly remember being Nicklee.

I was wondering the same question so when I reviewed the memories I also found out why I started to remember my life as Nicklee. You see Hojo had wanted to see what would happen if mako was inserted straight into your brain. And I just had the unfortunate luck to be the guinea pig.

It's funny you know, mako is suppose to make you forget shit but it made me remember instead!

I stop thinking as I heard foot step walking from down the hall that was next to my room. I found that I could tell whose footsteps were walking down the hall by the weight and sound. It would be cool in my opinion because:

A. I can jump the scientist coming into the room and scream 'Wolverine!'

B. Tackle hug one of the guards. (Wall Guard just laughs and Sir Douchbag just screams like a little girl.)

C. Hide under the bed and hiss like a cat at anyone that tries to take me out and scratch their hand or face.

D. Run out the door screaming 'Freedom' and run all over the place mapping out the areas that Sep might be in while I'm being chase and yelling 'Nah Nah Nah Neh Neh Neh you can't catch me you can't catch me'.

E. And who would forget biting their ankles when they piss me of. (I thing I got the 'Ankle Biter Achievement' its right between my 'Crazy Bitch Achievement' to 'Road Kill Achievement'.)

Anyway the person walking down the hall was currently Sir Douchbag.

…I just got a great idea.

"I spy with my little eye something cute, funny, is a girl, likes you, loves the color pink, and about to entire through the door" I said with a large smile as I watch Wall Guard sit up quickly and turned to look at me.

"A girl that likes me…" Wall Guard said with a daze.

"Loves you to be truthful." I said with a grin.

"There's a girl that loves me! Hang on honey I'm coming!" Wall guard said as he quickly stand up and ran to the door tripping only once and throwing it open to revile Sir Douchbag.

Silence filled the room.

"…You're a girl, Jack!" Wall man yelled out and grabbed Sir Douchbag chest.

Sir Douchbag replied was a 'What the hell!' and punched Wall man face.

I almost died laughing.

 **I'm A Line I'm A Line I'm A Line I'm A Line I'm A Line I'm A Line Oh Oh Oh OHHH I'm A Line Yyyaaahhhh**

So after everything calm down, Sir Douchbag told us that the 'Wimp of the Sciences Department' (Sissy Doctor) wanted to see me.

I'm being watch by him since Hojo is more focused on Sep right now. (Bad for him good for me.)

I had to be dragged from the room with my bed while their ears were hurting from my 'Nope's!' that I shouted over and over again.

Hey its still a scientist working for Hojo anyone would react like this.

After being dragged into the lab he basically did some non painful test to check to see how I reacted to the mako inserted into my brain before (which I pretended to act high and shit so basically throwing a chair at him while shouting 'Boss Pedobear'.) then sent me on my way back to my room with Wall Guard (still need a new nickname for him) and Sir Douchbag.

Now everything was going normal when being sent back to my room so I was singing 'Kyles mom is a big fat bitch!' with Hojo replacing the words Kyles mom. Wall trying to keep up with me even though he didn't know the words (And putting 'beep' in every curse word during the song.) plus chocking on his laughter doesn't help and Sir Douchbag was looking torn from killing us for our beautiful sing to laughing (I would be surprised if he can) at what we were calling Hojo.

Till apparently one of the dumbass scientists had accidently let lose one of the more dangerous experiments one that look like it had a dragons head, a tigers body, hooves for feet, and a fish like tail (so basically my uncle on a good day) about the size of a Shire Horse the largest horse in the world that can carry atlas three full grown adults and was now charging with super speed that I would be surprised if a SOLDIER would be able to stop- oh crap its coming straight at me!

 _'Again fuck my life's!'_ I could only thing as I put my arms over my face waiting for the bit that I hope was not poisoned.

But it never came and opened my eyes a bit to see the second most amazing sight I've ever seen. (The first was a unicorn when I was six years old at a zoo even though my brother insisted it was just a white rhino but I call bullshit on that.)

Sir Douchbag was shooting at the Draigourish (Dragon-Tiger-Hourse-Fish) legs but dame was that thing fast while Wall Guard was distracting it by throwing bread crumbs at it (where he got it I don't know and I really want to know).

But it wasn't only the fact that he was throwing bread crumbs that got my amazement not it was the fact he was-h-he was…

He was dogging with ease, doing flips like he's done it all his life, and JUMPING ON THE FUCKING WALLS!?

He's he's…

"Spiderguard" I whispered in awe and wonder as I watch Spiderguard (that's his new nickname...Maybe) jump from wall to wall while the Draigourish tried to catch him.

Finally Sir Douchbag was able to cripple the Draigourish by shoot both its front legs till the broke off from the body because of the weight making its face fall first. (Ha-ha…what? It was going to eat me and you can't just not find it funny when someone or something falls on their faces.)

"Goddess dammit, I hate working near the crazy scientist!" Sir Douchbag said lowering his gun and walk over to break the back legs of the Draigourish with the butt of his gun making the Draigourish cry out in pain (Sir Douchbag just got a 10 cool points).

"Oh come on Jack it wasn't that bad." Spiderguard said as he came back to the floor (aww I wanted to see more though.) and step right next to Sir Douchbag and throw his arm right arm over Sir Douchbag shoulder in a friendly way…I think? I don't know, I kind of think there secretly gay for each other.

"Not that bad, Charlie this is the third time this WEEK!" yelled Sir Douchbag in anger as I continue to look at them.

"Ok maybe it's not so good but hey atlas it wasn't like that time with the weird cactus man creature, what was it called again a Cactuar?" Spiderguard ask rubbing his jaw.

"Don't you ever bring up that incident again or I will hurt you violently." Sir Douchbag said it like a promise with a very angry glace at Spiderguard.

"Ok ok sorry" Spiderguard said as he took his hand off of Sir Douchbag shoulder holding both his hands up in a 'I surrender so don't chop my balls off' sign.

"Good just keep remembering that…hey brat why are you looking at us like that" Sir Douchbag ask as he slowly back away from me with both him and Spiderguard finally noticing my presence (about time bitch's).

"…Your Spiderman missing brother." I stated to Spiderguard.

"I'm who now?" Spiderguard ask with a question stare while I just smiled back with innocence.(NOT)

"Spiderguard of course"

"Wait I thought I was Wall guard before then Spiderman now Spiderguard? Just who is spiderman!" Spiderguard ask with curiosity.

"I'll never tell!" I yelled and then ran away from him while I 'accidently' (it was on purpose) step on the Draigourish bringing out another pain yelp from it and ran down the hall.

"Hey wait! Who's Spiderman!" I heard from behind me.

"Oh for the love of-about time you slow ass back up came! YOU deal with the reject of nature, I on the other hand got two idiots to catch." Sir Douchbag said from behind me before another pair of footsteps came from behind me also.

So we all just basically spent the next whatever hours since I don't have a watch running all over with shots of 'Never!', 'Who's Spiderman!', and 'I'm going to kill you two, fuckers!' till I got tiered and had to be carried to my room by Spiderguard (I think he forgot the question he was going to ask me) after I said 'carry me' to them and fell asleep in his arms. I'm a little piss about falling asleep but I'm physically a (maybe) three year old granted a mako squidish cells three year old but still just a three year old.

 **I'm A Line I'm A Line I'm A Line I'm A Line I'm A Line I'm A Line Oh Oh Oh OHHH I'm A Line Yyyaaahhhh**

After I woke up I remember there was a question I wanted to ask. But I waited for Sir Douchbag to get food for him and Spiderguard while I got disgusting paste that Hojo assigned for me to eat.

Yum thanks a lot Hojo…

NOT!

'Sigh' I miss real food…

"So there's one thing I just don't get." I said as I was crouching on the floor in front of the door waited for Sir Douchbag to come back in order to scare him into dropping his food with Spiderguard sitting on the side of the room away from the bed and door but facing it so he could see what I'm about to do.

"Yeah, what is it?"

"You two could easily make second class from what I've seen so why are you guys third?"

Spiderguard sat quietly for a moment and I was just about to ask again (like I give up that easily) till he stated to talk again.

"Jack…was a top second class a year ago when I was still a cabin, but you see…we were assigned to the same mission Jack was the co leader with another second class called Lan Green…they…they were best friend-brothers really not by blood but still brother they both came from rocket town and were in the same squad but anyway it was to take out some small terrorist organization just starting out that had stolen some important data of shinra they got their hands on so the place they were stationed at was close to a place called cosmo canyon, AVAL something I didn't really care about what its name was, so it was just suppose to be simple shoot them down get the data back give it to the Turks then leave the rest to the Turks the usual but no it didn't happen like that it was a trap, one of our own had betrayed us and Jack had to make a decision on whether he lets the squad die or get the data back…I guess you can tell which one he chose…so he got demoted to third, was shun by a lot of other SOLDIER's and half the squad he saved in order for them not to get mixed up with 'the disgrace SOLDIER and suffer his 'curse' rumor that started up, and got pick for a bunch of crappy missions and other stuff…no offence of course."

"Non taken" I replied in a not caring way after all I had to watch my cousins before and look at what happened I got run over.

"So yeah that why Jacks a third as for me well I punched the SOLDIER director Varin Cater when he called Jack a-wait sorry you too young for that, but anyways I was allowed to stay in SOLDIER because of my skill and the fact I'm supposed to be a 'bridge of understanding' between Shinra and Wutai pff like that will happen." Spiderguard casually Sa-wait WHAT!

"HUH!?" _'WHAT THE HELL!'_ I snapped my head to look straight at him with my eyes so wide I'm sure I look like a kitten doped on catnip and about to pouch on a toy…well I got the pouching part down now I just need a tail and cat ears.

"Ah right you didn't know, well you see I'm a member of the royal family Kisaragi my mother Uffie is the oldest sister of Godo emperor of Wutai so to try and make peace I was sent here to be a warrior of Shinra, they did it a lot of times a long time ago in Wutai along with marriages when it was still divided by clans and they made treaties with one another for peace and other thing too so yeah I'm Watui Royalty." Spiderguard kindly stated.

"B-but wait I heard Sir Douchbage call you Cha…Chal…Chalue he called you Chalue!" let it be know I can't remember people's names that well if I don't care enough to truly learn them.

"Charlie" Spiderguard corrected (bitch) "And I go by Charlie well Charlie Kiss to be honest because it difficult for people here to say Chinatsu Kisaragi so when I got here and people couldn't really say my name I decided to go by Charlie Kiss because it easier to say for other people here."

"Huh" I couldn't think of anything to say for that except 'what the fuck?'

I could hear Sir Douchbag coming down the halls now and got ready to get me some real food.

But as the door opened and I jump at Sir douchbag to steal his food Spiderguard said something I wasn't definedly was not expecting.

"Plus I also got to watch out for my little cousin Rai Shinra."

"WHA-"

BAMB

"Fffffffuuuuuuuuuuuu-"

I smacked head first into Sir Douchbag's balls.

* * *

 **Unkown: Done And Done! Ok It Like Whoe Late I'm Going To Bed, I Hope You Engoyed This Chapter And All** **The Surprise It Had, Bye!**


	4. NO LEARNING IT BURNS

**(Show a dark abyss till a arm pops out from the ground and then shows Unkown crawling out of the ground spitting out dirt that they got in there mouth.)**

 **Unkown: Hey Everyone! First Of I'm Really Sorry I Haven't Updated In A Couple of Months But Well I'll Be Completely Honest I Got Lazy. Yes I Have No Other Excuse But That I Got Lazy And Addicted To Undertale, If You Haven't Heard Of It Check It Out. Also Saw The Final Episode For Gravity Falls And It Was Awesome I'm Happy That They Got A Good Ending A Little Sad It Didn't Go To Season 3 But I Get It That Something's Have To End Before People Get Sick Of Seeing It Over And Over Again Like The Ugh Walking Dead For Example Plus I Also Saw The Final Episode For RWBY Volume 3 And OMG Why! (Unkown begins to gain the feel for what had happened in the Season 3 Final Episode.)**

 **Ok Than Story Time! (Unkown pointing in a random direction to distract you then jumps down hole they made clawing their way out of the ground.)**

* * *

 **Chapter 3: I Barf The Rainbow, Sir Douchbage's Crushed Pride, And NO LEARNING IT BURNS!**

"Fucking hell of a no good motherfucker of a shit piece of shit this goddame hurts!" Sir Douchbage hissed as he put Spider walls drink on his crotch trying to ease the pain from its coldness as he sat on the floor with his back on the wall and hands holding the drink with his head down.

"You sure you don't need to go to the infirmary Jack?" Walling Spiders ask with a bit of concern and amusement as he sat next to Sir Douchbage confirming that they are gay for one another even if they try to deny it.

"And come back with a squirrel for a dick and fish eyes for testicles no fucking thanks!" Sir Douchbage half yelled half hissed in a pissed off voice but what else is new?

Oh I couldn't let this opportunity pass up. "Aw I think you would look great with a squirrel dick Sir Douchbage, after all it would be bigger~" I said between stuffing my face of Rainbow Doritos chips and coca-cola soda don't ask me why it exist here though because that will just confuse the fuck out of you.

"I hope you chock on those you little shit!"

I just laugh at that, I'm mean really what are the odds of tha-

"Hickka!"

Oh shit I'm chocking.

I reach up to my throat tying to do something like barf up the stuff or try to church the chips in my throat. Wait wouldn't that cut my throat open or something?

Heh Sir Douchbage and Wallmans face are really funny right now.

Even if the black spots are kind of blocking my vision.

Oh my god, I'm going to die before I have a chance to fuck anything up.

This sucks like Sir Douchbage future squirrel dick!

"Oh fuck I didn't mean it latterly!" Sir Douchbage yelled and tried to get up but let out a girly whine before griping his crotch again in agony. Wimp!

"What do we do, what do we do, WHAT DO WE DO!" Spiderwall yelled and whooped his head left to right while griping his helmet.

How about you give me the HEIMLICK!

"Give him the Heimlich!" That's what I thought!

"WHY WOULD HIM LICKING HELP!?" Wha?

"HEIMLICK NOT HIMLICK YOU FUCKING MORON!" Are you on drugs spider wall man?

"IM STILL NOT SURE WHAT HIM LICKING WOULD HELP AT ALL!?" WHY THE FUCK IS HE SAYING HIM (Sudden realizations like when you realize you grandparents still have sex even if there so wrinkly, missing all their teeth, and apparently one of the reasons they break their hips is from it!)-oh my fucking god...

Sir Douchbage must of came to the same conclusion as me because he was looking at Spiderswall or atlas I think he did the black spots just block out his face.

"FUCK YOU DON'T KNOW THE WORD HEIMLICK HERE DO YOU, GODDAME FUCKING LAUGHUADE BARRIER!" Yeah! Wait did I just say that any language that not English. (Is it the English language we talking here? I can't fuck tell it all sound English though, you know what fuck it I'm dying right now so this shit can wait.)

Oh right Spidermans Wall was raised in Wutai he probably doesn't know a couple of words or some shit and of course Heimlich wouldn't be one of them.

Well their completely useless guess I have to go the hard way to save myself cuz like fuck I'm going to die before I cut off Hojo's left testicle.

 _'Shit this is going to hurt!'_ I thought as I stood up and quickly ran at the bed before hitting my stomach against the middle of the bed making me vomit on it and forcing me back on the ground clenching my stomach.

I have tasted the rainbow and it made me barf.

 _'Motherfucker this hurt!'_ I thought as I ground at the pain while stating to sit up as Spiders man wall came over checking me over like a mother goose after she chases you away from walking too close to their baby I mean fuck back in my old life I still had that scar on my left leg from when I was seven when I was force to visit my cosine twice removed duck farm though it was a pretty sweet looking scar it still fucking hurt though.

He then grabbed me in a hug like he thought I was going to die of something (like I'll let that happen so soon) and started to talk really fucking fast, wait what's that coming out of his helmet, is it? Oh my fucking god he's crying, shit what do I do when a grown mans crying from not being super drunk or having there balls being stomped on.

He talked while trying to not chock on his words "Goddess you scared me there don't you ever do that again ohpleasepleasePLEASEneverdothatagain!" OK I understood somewhat half of it maybe but then it just started to sound like when my older brother talks to me like thing of responsibility and get my feet of the table.

"Um ok? There there?" I really suck at conferring ok. I mean I'm the person who says 'That sucks.' when someone tells me someone they know dies.

"By the Goddess saggy tits you scared us there you brat, thought we were going to have to deal with fucking creepo boss there for a seconded." Sir Douchbage said with annoyance but I think there was a bit of relief in there too maybe.

I couldn't help but smile and reply "Aw, so you do have a heart under all that Douchness, Sir Douchbage." After that I grimaced at the way my voice sounded and how fucking much it hurt.

"Why don't you go chock on you vomit, little piece of shit."

"Ha ha ha whatever you say but you know you love me."

It hurts to laugh though.

"Ok Ok you two break it up" Spidery Wally's said as he finally allowed himself to pull away from his goose hug and stood up in front of me.

Oh god he's going to give me a lecture isn't he.

Good thing I got practice to bloke him out from my older brothers lectures!

"Bla bla bla safety bla bla bla care about you bla bla bla chew slower bla bla bla crushing the balls of somebody bla bla bla"

Ugh some of his lectures words are leaking through, it would be much better listening to like thirteen cats in heat then this shit.

Oh good he's done now I can start immediately ignore everything he said before and do it again if it was fun.

"Now let's check on you Jack." He turned around and went to Sir Douchbage leaning on the wall with the drink still press to his crotch.

"'Sigh' let's just get this over with" Guess he doesn't want to be lectured too, I know your pain Sir Douchbage even if you are kind of an asshole.

Wall guard sat next to Sir Douchbage and lifter his pant a little.

My Yaoi senses are going crazy.

...I didn't even know I had those...

"Don't worry I'm sure it not that…" he trailed of when he looked down.

"What?"

"…You never wanted kids Jack right?" Oh…

"…Oh you've got to be fucking kidding me…" Oh god…

""PFF HAHAHAHA" Oh my god I think I busted a lung BUT SO FUCKING WORTH IT!

"IM GOING TO KILL YOU!" Sir Douchbage yelled at me and tried to get up but failed and was hold back by Wally's Spider while I did the 'come at me bro' sign at him.

Fucking hurt when he throw his boot at me though.

 **I'm A Line I'm A Line I'm A Line I'm A Line I'm A Line I'm A Line Oh Oh Oh OHHH I'm A Line Yyyaaahhhh**

After the commotion died down and I got new bed sheets we went back to what we were original going to do Sir Douchbage eating his ham, anchovies, and mayo sandwich (…Gross…) with a ice bag on his crotch now, Spiders Wall eating his Chocobo sandwich (There not just for riding apparently so in the words of Ruby from Rwby 'Birdie, no!' or something like that.) while sharing the drink that had been on Sir Douchbage crotch with him and I'm eating the chips and coca-cola granted a bit slower.

I rather screw with everybody minds before it die anytime soon.

"Hey spider guard you never finish that story about what happen to Lan Green or why you didn't cause a war after punching the director in the face!" I still haven't heard the full story so I might as well get it now.

Sir Douchbage and Wall Spider-Man's face look shocked for a moment before Sir Douchbage face that I could see shifted in to anger as he crush the soda in his hand and turn to look at Spider Wall-Mans face tying to play off as innocent by looking to the side and whistling.

"Charlie you fucking told him!"

"Em…Well…Err…Kind of?"

"What the fuck? Just what the fuck were you thinking?"

"I…Ah…Wasn't?"

Sir Douchbage just puts his head down into his hands and shakes his head while groaning like a little bitch.

"You know what fuck it lets tell him." Huh look like Sir Douchbage has final given up today.

Spiders Man looks at Sir Douchbage in surprised.

"Really?"

"Sure why the fuck not."

Man spider suddenly gained a serious look that kind of looks like he's constipated to me and turned to look me.

"Ok, Entropy just remember this stays between the three of us if you dare tell another person then ill curse you to always have the taste Hojo paste flavor food in all your food for the rest of your life."

I couldn't help but gasp at that "You wouldn't."

Oh God That Smirk "Oh wouldn't I?"

Why?!

Why?

Why…?

Why is it kind of sexy looking?

I mean his entire face isn't even shown?!

And he's apart of a fucking fiction world!

Granted I'm now apart of that fiction world to but that's beside the point!

I quickly shook my head and then nodded it after all this is FFVII if there's a way to turn people into frogs then there's a way to curse someone to only have the taste of one food flavor for the rest of your life.

And like hell I'll let that be Hojo's food.

"Well you see remember when I was talking about the traitor in the group before? Well that was Lan Green but you probably guessed that already huh so ill move on from there-" So he's going to skip that for Sir Douchbage and isn't going to explain it to me...eh I'll allow it. "-the reason I didn't lucky case a war, thank goddess for that, was because lucky at the same time it was exposed that Varin Cater was apparently exploiting money from the company and was a fuc-fuging ped-bad man."

"Oh for the love of Odin's saggy left testicle you can fucking curse in front of him I mean by the goddess hidden dick he's bound to know so much fucking worse then what I know that's for sure."

"It true Crawling spider wall."

Crawling Walls look at me with annoyance "ok we are going to have a talk about those nicknames one day and Jack my mom raised me better then that!" he paused for a second after that before continuing. "Well the maids did actually since mom couldn't take care of me at the time and dad had dropped me those couple of times because of his hand tremor and one time for trying to reenact that lion king scene with the cliff but that beside the point!" (That explains so mush.)

"Ok ok let's get this fucking over with Charlie I want to finish eating before more fuck up shit happens to us."

"Okay then so anyway Varin Carter was a bad man-" He means that he was a fucking pedophile from what he was going to say before he chicken out. "-and when this was learn it was only a few hours after I punch him but if I had known at the time you can be da-darn sure that I would have ripped his fu-never mind anyway after it was discovered, I was pardon from that crime and was let off with a warning thankfully."

"Well that's pretty nice to not be known as the one how started a war, I guess." Course it would be one hell of a way to get in the history books. I can picture it now 'This man caused a war by punching someone in the face for being a dick.' That would have been a fun lesson to learn back in my past school.

You know that kind of sounds like something I would do...

...Maybe ill do it some day, maybe.

He gave a nerves smiled at that and look to be sweating a little at that before he started again.

"Y-yeah well I rather never be known as the one that brought war to where I live but when I heard him talking about his solider like that well I just thought of it as a great dishonor for a leader to not truly care for his soldiers and by the time I realized what happen my fist was already meeting his cheek. Thank the goddess that it didn't reach home that I punch him or my mom may just kill me!" He then scratches his cheek in a nerves way when he mentioned his mom.

Oh well I can tor-I mean ask...you know what asking doesn't sound as much as torture, so I'll torture the answer out of him later if I don't forget but right now it's time to find out who this mystery person Rei Shinra is.

"But wait who is Rei Shinra exactly?"

"'Rai Shinra well as I said before she's my little cousin from my mom side of the family Kisaragi, Rai's mother was my aunt but she unfortunately died a while ago so Rai is currently living with her father President Shinra and from what I heard a little brother name Rufus. Actually she's the one that exposed to every one of Varin Carters crimes, not sure on the detail though." He finished with a hint of pride in his voice.

"That's pretty cool."

Now it time to ask a life changing question that I never thought or want ted to before in my old life.

I made my face turn serious when I look at wall spiders man who look like he was about to laugh at my face. (I'll smash his balls if he does.)

"Wall spiders of the fourth dimension, I want you to train me to be able to jump walls like a boss."

I still can't believe I'm basically asking for exercise willingly ugh, if my brothers saw me actually asking that in real life I'm sure that they would have a double heart attacks or something like that. But hell I'm in final fantasy where you could die any minute and I'm going to have to deal with going to the Wutai war, so yeah better to learn now then later when I'm basically run threw a god dame sword.

Spider wall of the eight dimension look confused as he stared at me. "...Jump walls? Oh you mean you want me to train you in the way of a ninja…why?"

"Oh because I'm someday I'm probably going to save the world from an alien squid thingy, maybe." Might as well give the truth of why I need it, right?

Both Wall spider of the first dimension and Sir Douchbage look at me with wide eyes (I think, again masks) and then at each other before back at me.

Sir Douchbage asks me first. "…And exactly why do you know that?"

"Oh because I am a reincarnated from a world where you guys were all video game characters and the alien space bitch was one of the main boss's that you had to defeat."

Sir Douchbage just look at me in silence before replying. "…Ok sure." Sir Douchbage then leans over to Wall-spider of the ninth diminution and whispered. "This kid is fucking insane."

SpiderWall replied to him. "Well he was raised by Hojo or all people."

"You know I can here you pricks, right…"

They both quickly stop and turned to me while Sir Douchbage decided now would be the perfect time to continue his lunch, SpiderWall was looking at me as if decided of something or if he was constipated.

"Ok I'll teach you."

"You will!" "You are?!"

Then Spider-wall of the seventh dimension holds up his right hand.

"But I'll only teach you speed none of the wall jumping or anything like that."

I made a face at that. I mean really I would have been cool if I could jump walls. "Ugh ok" But out know what fuck it I'm learning something after all, plus he was pretty fast when dodging the Draigourish.

"And I'm going to teach you the Wutai language."

Oh god LEARNING ONE OF MY MANY WEAKNESS, NO!

Before I could say anything he continued. "And if you don't agree to these demands that I won't teach you."

"Fuuuccck fine." God dame it school all over again, you know now that I think about it dying might be better than this.

Don't think I don't see you laughing over there Sir Douchbage!

"Ok than start by doing fifty suicides run while saying the Wutai ABC song now it goes like this…"

Well atlas it will hope hopefully be useful.

But still LEARNING SUCKS!

* * *

 **And Done Wow This Chapter Was A Tuffie To Write Sorry If It's Not Really Good And Again I'm Sorry About It Being Late Anyway I Will Hopefully Will Update It Sooner Now Though Well Bye And Please Review.**


	5. Goodbye My Bitch's

**Unkown: Hey Everyone How's It Going! Ok So Been About Over A Couple Of Months (I'm A Dick I Know Know And I'm Really Sorry About That.) Since I Last Updated Let's Just Say A Lot Of Shit Happened In My Life Recently That Are Privet So Were Just Going To Get Right Into The Story But First Message To Reviews From Guest That Don't Have Accounts On FanFiction...Or Just Didn't Log In! Sorry That I'm Doing This Late But I Wasn't Sure If I Should or Not, Then I Decided The Third Option To Everything, Option 'Fuck It'.**

 **To Guest-**

 **Ajanta sangma: I Try To Make My Story's Interesting For People To Read And Hell Maybe Inspire People Or Something.**

 **Ole: Thanks!**

 **Iheatlife888: Anyone Should Be Pitted For Having Nicklee/Entropy For A Sibling. And I'll Try My Best To Make This Story Awesome As It Can Be!**

 **Ajanta: Thanks I Thought It Was Funny To But I Figured It Would Get Boring Fast So That's Why All The New Nicknames And Stuff.**

 **Guest: I Know But I Want To Make This Story Be More Realist, I'm Mean Let's Face It As Much As We May Want To Deny It There's A Good Fifty To Fifty Chance That Hojo Is Sephiroth's Father But That Also Means There's A Good Chance That Vincent Is The Father It Never Really Clarifies What Year Vincent And Lucrecia Broke Up And Her And Hojo Getting To Gather And When Sephiroth Was Conceived Other Then The Years 1977-1982, So Yeah.**

 **...Which Doesn't Explain How The Fuck How Was Lucrecia Still Pregnant In 1984 When Sephiroth Was Born In 1980...I'm Mean Maybe It's A Translation Error Or Something But Still 'WTF'? Don't Believe Me Look Up Final Fantasy Seven Timeline On Wiki. Hopefully The New Remake Game Will Explain This...Hopefully.**

 **Mari: I Will Try! And Yeah It Going To Be Fun When They Meet All The Characters Especially Yuffie But The Only Thing I Can Imagine When Those Two Meet Is Nothing But Fire, Vary Gleeful Laughter's and People Screams In The Background...Sucks To Be Them.**

 **Message To Guest End**

 **Languages**

"Talking"

 _'Thought'_

 _"_ _Wutain_ _languages"_

 _Video_

 **Unkown: Ok Then Let's Get A Roll On Then! See You At The Bottom Of The Page! (Ninja Puffs Out)**

* * *

 **Chapter 4: Goodbye My Bitch's And HOLY SHIT YOU LOOK JUST LIKE-!**

So far it's been like what three moths I think since I've woken up (Whatever you want to call It.) into my new life in Final Fantasy VII as Entropy brother of a person who gained a place in 'One of the Deadly Mother Fucker to Ever Be Born' hall of fame Sephiroth. It's been pretty good so far but boring as fuck doing the same thing over again every day so far from getting checkups and stuff from Sissy Doctor and learning speed powers of badassness (Don't care if it not a word so shut up!) plus Wutain from Sensei Guard Spider. (Since I refused to call him Sensei Charlie or anything like that and I was running out of different nicknames.)

I'll tell you this though, Wutain is fucking weird.

I mean it's basically like mixing all the languages in Asia into a huge cluster brain fucking of words put into a bladder at a slushy level of butchering a language but that's only based off any Asian languages I heard which was mostly Japanese from Anime and a bit of Chines from those Chine's restaurants I went to in my previous life for food.

 _"Hey Sir Douchbage do you even have a dick? Cuz you bitch like a pubescent girl on her first period!"_

But is so fucking worth it when you can make fun of people and they can't even fucking understated you!

"I may not be able to understand you, you little shit but I can sure as fuck can tell when you're mocking me!"

See! Learning another language to insult people is great! The only reason Sir Douchbage knows I'm insulting him is because whenever I talk to him it involves some sort of insult or mockery to him.

"Entropy be nice and Jack please calm down what he said about you wasn't that bad..ish." (Bitch please.)

"Charlie, just because I can't understand fucking Wutain that much doesn't mean I can't tell when this fucking little shit is being a goddess dame brat!"

And so begins calming down Sir Douchbage from his period rage mode.

As you can see these guys are still the same as ever with Sir Douchbage living up to his name sake and Sensei Guard Spider is being kind of cool sometime.

Also I started to call SpiderGuard Sensei Guard Spider because he started to teach me and I was running out of nicknames for him with guard or spider in it so yeah.

I've also started to fondly call them my 'Bitch's'.

Sir Douchbage gave me the finger and Sensei Guard Spider just asks what a 'bitch' was.

I just said it was another way of saying friend.

Fucking hilarious when he called Sir Douchbage his bitch.

But unfortunately like all good things (or fuck up great things) they must all eventually come to an end.

That right apparently Sir Douchbage and Sensei Guard Spider are being transfused over to Kalm Town.

Today's the last day too…

I was pissed when I learned about it a week ago.

 ***FLASHBACK TIME***

"WHAT?!" I shout in shock at what I just heard.

Sir Douchbage just nodded his head with a bit of enthusiasm before saying. "That right you little shit me and Charlie are getting transferred out of this hellhole." Don't need to be so fucking happy about it.

I just looked at him with an agape mouth I'm sure before turning to Sensei Guard Spider head tilted left as he looks sadly at the ground it appeared (There like always wearing helmets when there near me people, I don't even know what hair color they have!) "Is-is this true Sensei Guard Spider?"

Sensei Guard Spider just looks at me before replying in a sad voice. "Yeah, we will be transfused to Kalm Town to deal with some sort of crime increase there."

"But-but you guy are my bitch's, my bitch's." I whined. (Yes I whined, I'm a little kid so I'm kind of allowed to even if I'm mentally a twenty three old women…wait dose being mentally in these body count as mental aging? Am I mentally twenty six or something?...You know what fuck it I'm a mental twenty something year old girl trapped in the body of a boy toddler that will have a fuck up sort of life since I'll have to deal with a whole lot of shit form murder alien squid thingy and some crazy ass mother fuckers that will most likely want to eat me or something…that's right I'm talking about the fans Sep will have in the future known as the silver something something crazy people, so I'm going to whine whenever I want too so deal with it.)

Sir Douchbage opened his both to say something bitchy by the way his mouth opened before Sensei Guard Spider cutted him off to ask. "What's a bitch?"

I cutted of Sir Douchbage quickly before he could say anything. (This is going to be funny.) "It means being special best friends"

Then before Sir Douchbage could get in his bitchy comment at me for telling before Sensei Guard Spider the wrong way the word bitch is used he cutted him off.

"Oh ok then." Sensei Guard Spider then turned to Sir Douchbage who had his mouth open to avidest make out with Sensei Guard Spider. (Why can't they see their gay so just do 'it' already! Sheesh.)

"If that's so then Jack you are, and always will be, my bitch." Sensei Guard Spider said sweetly with his head tilted to the left.

Yeah that was funny.

Even when Sir Douchbage head butted him.

And he had got sent to the infirmary with a broken chine.

 ***FLASHBACK ENDS***

I should probably be worried about the bombing going to happen Kalm Town now that they're going there right? Well I'm not that worried because it going to happen in like what thirteen years? That's plenty of time, right?

…right?

Right, so they'll be fine.

I then heard a pair of unfamiliar footsteps walking down the hall.

Judging by what I can see of Sir Douchbage face and Sensei Guard Spider they heard them too.

Sensei Guard Spider looked at me sadly like a puppy denied a dog treat. "…so this is it then." (I will not cry dame it!)

Sir Douchbage turned his face to the right and readjusted his helmet before turning to me. "Well brat it been horrifying to know you-"(Dick)"-but to be honest…it wasn't so so bad it was funny when you were making those scientist assholes lives miserable." (Ok wow…was not expecting that.)

"Yeah it be fun making your lives difficult my bitches especially you, Sir Douchbage!" (And there's the grumpy bitchy face coverd by that god dame helmet I know and love to mess with.) "But don't worry we will see each other _Real_ soon, so ah till then uh don't die and shit."

…I suck a see you later and shit ok.

"Same with you, you creepy little shit." Sir Douchbage as a reflex at this point.

"'Sniff' 'sniff'" And Sensei Guard Spider started to cry a bit.

A knock was then heard before me or Sir Douchbage could comment on Sensei Guard Spider Crying.

Sir Douchbage then went to the door as Sensei Guard Spider tilted his head to see who will be my new (victim) guard will be.

"About time you got here you slow ass new-new-ne-oh my goddess…" Well who it is it gave Sir Douchbage a baby heart attack.

"… _holy Shit…"_ …DID SENSEI GUARD SPIDER JUST CURSED JUST WHO IS THIS GUY?! (In all the months I'd know him, he's _never_ curse, not one at all, and I don't think he's entirely human because of that.)

Then a voice that sounded kind of familiar to me spoke. "Hello you must be third class Jackie Ferris and Chinatsu Kisaragi it's nice to meet you."

Sir Douchbage and Sensei Guard Spider quickly straighten up and gave the military salute while Sir Douchbage stepped to the side of the door to give room to the new guy.

When he stepped in I almost had a heart attack right there. (or maybe I had a baby heart attack because I swear I felt something in my cheats, though I could of just drop a Cheetos too down my shirt let me check…yep cheetos 'crunch' sweet, now were where we? Oh right Cloud MOTHERFUCKING Strife IS RIGHT HERE IN FRONT OF ME!)

"HOLY SHIT, CLOUD!"

I was then stared at by the said person.

"I'm pretty sure I'm not a mass of water vapors in the sky."

"…Wha?"

Sensei Guard Spider then walked over to me, "Entropy I have no idea who this 'Cloud' you're talking about is but this is General Skylar of the old Shinra Army."

"…Say Whaaat?"

Seriously though 'WTF' this guy looks like he could be Clouds clone! The only thing different is the way the hair is cut differently in a different style and the fact he's wearing glasses.

His clothes were basically a bright red bandana, a worn out old light brown jacket that has the bottom of it reaching to his ankle with darker brown leather on his arm cuffs, black gloves, a black shirt, dark blue pants, dark brown leather boots with black being the outsole (you know the rubbery bottom part?...what I know stuff!) of the boot, and his glasses looking like black business glasses.

Oh, he's carrying a longsword type with dark green handle with a cyan color stone that in a olive like shape on the top of the handle.

But seriously 'JUST WHAT THE FUCK!'

* * *

 **Unkown: (Pops up) And Done For Now! (Sorry About The Cliffhanger…) But Nex Time Will See How Nickless/Entropy Handel General Skylar.**

 **Unkown: Again I Am So Sorry I Updated Late…Again. But I'll Try Harder To Update Sooner Then Before Thought I Can't Make Any Promise On It But Again I'm Sorry. Here's Something To Hopefully Make It A Little Better Enjoy!**

 **Unkown: (Takes out remote and pushes one of the buttoms on it.)**

*VIDEO*

 _The video plays to show a young teen like Nicklee with two mid-back braids with hair sticking out in places from how curly it was with a black sport helmet on her head in a short sleeve v-neck red tee-shirt, pale brown cargo pants that went to above knee length, with sport protections on her knees and elbows, and wearing a white pair of roller blades next to a skating pipe in what appeared to be in the middle of a skating park in a pale blue sky with very little clouds._

 _The Teen Nicklee grinned at the camera and said. "Prepare to be amazed everyone as I skate this pipe for the first time since I was nine year old."_

"… _you know this isn't going to end well right, Nicklee…?" said a girl's voice in a British accent off of the screen._

" _Pff you're just jealous that you don't know how to use rollerblade's."_

" _I'm not sure about either, Nick." Replied another girl's voice off screen as Nicklee's head turned slightly to the left with a look of betrayal on it._

" _What!? Titi, you traitor! "_

" _We just don't want you to get hurt!"_

" _I'm perfectly fine with her getting hurt."_

 _Nicklee turned to the camera, giving the double bird to it._

" _A-(Honking of a car is heard of screen blocking out noise.)!"_

" _She took me here after I literally just cooked my own breakfast, I'm hungry and angry, ok."_

" _That's still no excuse, and Nick you should have let A-(Another Honking of a car is heard of screen blocking out noise.) eat, now get down there before you hurt yourself."_

" _Or just do it already so we can see your failure, the battery is almost dead and being near this highway is hurting my hearing."_

 _The camera jerks slightly as the second girl says "Don't tell her that!"_

" _Alright, alright just stop hitting my arm."_

" _Hey you two stop bitching and get in positions already, Titi you got the party streamer gun thingy ready? Good! And queen A-(Screeching from car tires are heard) bitch a lot over there make sure the camera gets this shit." Nicklee says as she get in front of the pipe a couple steps away and looks like she's going to run or jump._

" _Now world be ready to be amazed as I totally will land this trick and show A-(Screeching from car tires are heard) that she's nothing but a jealous queen bitch for this!"_

 _Nicklee skate to the pipe then jumps on the skating pipe and manages to skate half way till the end where she had lost her footing making one leg go left and the other right with her landing crotch first on the pipe._

' _CLANG'_ _'crack'_

 _Dead silence followed with only a light thud heard after that as the screen show Nicklee face going from shock to pain as she then moved here hands between her legs and leaned right with her legs crossed on the pipe, where she was close to the grown let her legs uncross and fall on the grown shoulder first then went into a fetus position with her hands still between and back at the camera._

 _Faintly the words "M-my ta-taco…" are heard._

" _O-oh my GOD NICK! Just-Uh-Just stay there I'll-I'll call my mom!" Footsteps are heard as someone ran._

 _Nicklee is shown trying to turn over and succeeding after a good two tries with her hands still between her legs and face grimed with pain as she grinds her teeth together._

" _Your mom ant going to do Jackshit Titi, you known that she believes that pain is something you can walk off…also if she says to walk it off why SHE doesn't try doing it while having a fucking crush Taco!" Nicklee is shown shouting at where the footsteps were heard before laying background muttering what was faintly heard as cursed words before looking at the camera and scowling._

"… _And just what the hell are you so smug bitch ass about…"_

 _The screen is then shown moving to the left and then shown to be moving down till it appears to be laying on the grown still showing Nicklee scowling up at where the camera once was._

" _Just at the failure of an idiot for trying to do something she thought that it couldn't go wrong…as it was expected."_

 _A slight pop is heard as little streamers are shown to be floating down to Nicklee as her scowled deepens._

 _A 'LOW BATTERY' sign amperes and disappear over and over again on the screen as Nicklee opens her mouth wile glaring in the direction that the voice was heard from._

" _Hey how about you kiss me bruised lips, A-"_

 _Screen blackout._

*VIDEO ENDS*

 **Unkown: Bye For Now! (Pops out.)**

 **Unkown: (Pops back in.) Oh Also I'm Thinking Of Doing An Undertale Watches The Pacifist Rout Before Frisk Came. (Or Atlas Before Flowey Meet Them First, By The Way It Will Only Have Toriel, Sans, Papyrus, Undying, Alphys, And Asgore There I Might Add More Late Though If I Feel Like It.) There Already Two On Achieve Of Our Own (Which I Place To Place A Little Idiocy Never Hurt Or Did It? On There Too.) Known As *Hopes And Dreams by InsomiaticFrenchToast*(Not Sure Witch Rout That Will Follow) And * by OurAnimeLives*(Which Follows The Genocide Rout). Bye Again! (Pops out again.)**


	6. Not a chapter

Ok guys there's a reason I'm haven't been updating its at the bottom of my profile for the whole story but I'm going to have to put this on break for a while sorry again.


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